


Talk To Me

by Simonsaysbaz



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Baz thinks hes subtle, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Look idrk what this is, Love Confessions, M/M, Normal conversation turned deep conversation turned love confessions, also theyre friends, does this make much sense? No, he aint, i whipped this out in like an hour, is it completely awful? Maybe but hopefully not, just overall cuteness, lots of flirting, non magical au i guess, only dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-21
Updated: 2020-03-21
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:27:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23250931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Simonsaysbaz/pseuds/Simonsaysbaz
Summary: Dialogue only Snowbaz conversation. Yes, there is gay stuff.
Relationships: Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Comments: 8
Kudos: 89





	Talk To Me

**Author's Note:**

> Um I don't really know what this is and why I'm posting it but I don't hate it so?
> 
> (In case you cant tell, Simon is the first line and Baz is the second and then they just keep going like that. Simon third, Baz fourth and so on.) (I'm over explaining aren't I?)

"Why am I so stupid?"

"You're not stupid, Snow."

"I am. Everyone says so. People always laugh at me whenever I get my test scores back. Mr. Rowan called me a dunce the other day."

" That's... That's so horrible. Mr. Rowan's a prick."

"He's not wrong though. I got a 27 in the Math midterms, Baz. 27."

"Even though you studied?"

"I was sure I'd get at least a B... I tried so hard..."

"Simon.. You aren't stupid. Don't take this wrong way but I think you might have some...learning disabilities. Have you ever maybe thought of that?"

"I know I've got dyslexia. I went to a therapist when I was a kid and I think she noticed some other things wrong with me but my dad didn't want to hear it. He said me not being able to read was bad enough and that people should stop telling him stuff that was wrong with me."

"... Do you still see one?"

"What?"

"A therapist."

"Baz, you know what my dad is like. And- And I don't need one anyway. I'm not _mental_. Just dumb."

"Please stop saying that about yourself."

"Why not? Everyone says it. _You_ say it. You call me thick all the time."

"I don't mean it... I just say that like...friends do. Like banter. You call me an arsehole."

"Well yeah but, I don't always know you don't mean it."

"I don't always _mean_ the things I say, Snow, just like I don't always _say_ the things I mean. I'm a deflector. I deflect."

"Deflect from what?"

"The things I mean."

"Like?"

"I don't know... Nice things. Vulnerable things."

" _Like_?"

"Are you fishing for compliments, Snow?"

"Yeah. I'm pretty defenseless right now."

"Well, that was blunt."

"I'm not a deflector."

"..."

"Baz ...?

"

"If... If I said the things I mean... I don't think we would be friends anymore."

"Why? Do you mean to say awful things to me?"

"The opposite."

"Why would I _not_ want to be your friend for you saying nice things?"

"The things I want to say aren't what friends should say to each other."

"Baz..."

"We aren't talking about me right now, Snow. You...you don't need to be mental to see a therapist. It's a perfectly normal thing to seek some professional help when things get ...too much."

"... You _are_ a deflector."

"Simon."

"Okay, okay. Well... Even if I _wanted_ to see a therapist, my...uh, dad wouldn't let me. And I can't afford one."

"You could see the school counsellor? She isn't _that_ bad."

"Can you hear yourself? Last year she practically outed Keris to the entire school. Her parents wanted to sue."

"Yeah... That was poor form."

"If she accidentally said something about me, it would just confirm to everyone how much of a wreck I am."

"I think you underestimate how much of a wreck everyone else is. It's secondary school, Snow. Everyone is mean because they're dying inside."

"Are you? Dying inside."

"..."

"Baz?"

"Everyone has issues, Snow. I see a therapist. Once a week."

"..."

"Snow?"

"What... What do you talk about? With the therapist."

"This conversation isn't about me."

"But I _want_ to talk about you."

"Well, we're not."

"I like talking about you. I like learning things about you. If there was a three hour lecture on Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch, I'd actually sit through the entire thing and pay attention. You're rather fascinating."

"...Y-you can't just _say_ things like that Simon."

"Why not?"

"..."

"Earth to Baz."

"You just can't."

"We're best friends. I can say anything I want to you."

"Best friends..."

"What do you talk about in therapy?"

" _Sigh_."

"Did you just _say_ the word sigh out loud?"

"Let me dramatise."

"You always dramatise. You're the most dramatic person I've ever met."

"Don't depend on the stereotypes, Snow."

"Stereotypes?"

"Dramatic emo gay kid."

"You're not emo, wait, you're _gay_?"

"What? You can't _honestly_ be telling me that you didn't know."

"Well, I didn't know!"

"I've told you multiple times that I would shag Harry Styles in a heartbeat." 

"I thought that was just like a celebrity thing! Everyone thinks stuff like that!"

"Every guy thinks about _shagging_ other guys? Do _you_ think about shagging other guys?"

"Yes! Maybe! Sometimes... Is that not normal?"

"...Normal? Yes, but decidedly _not_ straight."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... Baz, I don't think I'm straight."

"Did you just come out to me, Snow?"

"You came out to me first!"

"I wasn't _in_ about anything. I just don't go around brandishing my sexuality."

"So... So you've _kissed_ another bloke before?"

"Well don't look so _horrified_ by it. And _no_. I haven't kissed anyone before."

"You're taking the piss."

"I'm not. And I know it's lame or whatever but you don't have to rub it in my face."

"I wasn't- I-I just can't believe it because you're so... Well, you!"

"I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do. You're incredibly fit, Baz. And brilliant. And kind-"

"I am _not_ kind."

"Well, you are to me."

"Hardly. And only because you enable my caffeine addiction."

"Yeah, right. _That's_ the reason. It's definitely not because you adore me or anything."

"Piss off, Snow." 

" _Basil and Simon sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-_ "

"I can't believe someone somewhere thought it proper to deem you a legal adult." 

"Me neither, to be honest. I just found out last week that a Lychee is a fruit and _not_ a type of rash. Gareth of all people had to point that out to me." 

"Simon no..."

"Simon yes."

"I hate you."

"Well, I _love_ you."

"Ugh! You're so... Ugh!"

"Have I managed to render the great Baz Grimm-Pitch speechless? I must be a miracle worker."

"You make it so hard sometimes."

"Make what hard?"

"Everything."

"Hmm... Baz, can I ask you something?"

"I don't know, can you?"

"...You're literally just as bad as me, but- anyway. I'm being serious."

"... You _may_ ask me something."

"Why were you so terrible to me before? Like, back when we weren't friends."

"..."

"Baz."

"...You...you intimidated me. Made me nervous... Being around you kicked up my flight or fight response and yeah... I also just thought that was the only way to get your attention. And I...I wanted to get to know you. But I was scared."

"Scared?"

"It's stupid."

"What were you scared of, Baz?"

"Um... I don't know, you getting to know me back, I guess. I thought it would be better if you knew the fake version of me hated him instead of...knowing the real version of me... And still hating him."

"Why would you think I would hate you?"

"Why wouldn't you? I'm not exactly a likeable person."

"You're plenty likeable."

"I'm an arsehole, Snow. And a snob. And a prat. And antisocial."

"Well, yeah, sometimes, but that isn't _all_ of you. You're a lot more beautiful than you give yourself credit for."

"..."

"..."

"...Why are you holding my hand?"

"Because I want to. I always hold your hand."

"...Do you really think that about me...? That I'm beautiful...?"

"I think you're the most beautiful person in the world."

"Simon..."

"Baz. I have something to say to you okay? Don't freak out."

"I'm _already_ freaking out."

"I'm in love with you."

" _I am freaking out."_

"And I think you're in love with me too. Maybe... I'm not really sure about that part..."

"You can't be in _love_ with me!"

"Well I _am_ so I have no idea what you're going on about!"

"You can't love me, Simon! You said we were just friends minutes ago!"

"I said we were friends, not _just_ friends!" 

"Why are we yelling at each other!"

"I don't know! You started it! Why are you crying?!"

" I don't know! _You_ started it!" 

"I.."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"I- I love you, Baz." 

"..."

"Please say something."

"Y-you were with Agatha not even two months ago." 

" I- Well, _yeah_ , and I broke up with her because I realised how I felt for you." 

"..."

"Baz..."

"My head hurts."

" _Baz_."

"I..."

"You don't... You don't have to say it back... I understand if you don't feel the same way... I just, uh, wanted y-you to know... I- Um, I, maybe I shoul- mmph!" 

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Well, _that_ was surprising."

"I love you too. I have for...an embarrassingly  
long while." 

"How long?"

"Like I'd tell you. And stop smiling like that." 

"Smiling like what?"

"Like you're in love with me or something." 

" _Or something_."

"Shut up, Snow."

"You called me Simon before."

"I did nothing of the sort."

"You're _still_ such a prat."

"Hmmph. One kiss and you think the world is upside down."

"Two kisses." 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and please don't forget to wash your hands!


End file.
